Core Beliefs

Beliefs

As we grow up, we get to know ourselves better. countless things change and impermanence is the bitter pill that we must learn to swallow, the older we get.

Life never waits for you, nor does it give you time to catch up. Like a train, it speeds past as you stand and watch things come into your life, just as suddenly as they leave.

But as lonely as that may seem, we can't forget, that we keep ourselves company through thick and thin.

In our childhood, we come to form certain beliefs about who we are, and these are the core beliefs that go on to shape us as a person. These beliefs teach us what works for us and what doesn't. They help us get to know ourselves better

and are the tools that carve our character out of stone.

Core beliefs are essential for growth, and not having them can make us feel confused and distraught. But every page has 2 sides, and as much as we get attached to these core beliefs in our childhood, it's important to know when to let go of them.

Outgrowing ideals

Sounds stupid, doesn't it? Why would you uproot your anchor? After all this while, despite these beliefs being your support system, it sounds silly to leave them behind. Well as much as I'd like to stick to my comfort zone, I can't blind myself to the broader perspective.

We grow up fostering beliefs such as; I'm a good daughter, I'm a good friend and perhaps I'm a good person. Yes, we do question ourselves at times, but largely we grow around these beliefs and become who we are by trying to live up to them.

While necessary, these patterns need to change over time. If they don't, you will begin to cling to them rather than grow around them, and that would get you stuck in an endless rut.

The older we grow, the more and more complex we get, and the harder it is to generalize ourselves as a certain kind of person. So, by holding on to the belief of being a good person, you will end up constantly disappointing yourself trying to live up to an unrealistic ideal. Rather, you will judge yourself too harshly.

Like I said before, in a seemingly lonely life, if not yourself, you can't lean on pretty much anyone. As much as you trust someone, you can only hold yourself accountable for the course of your life. And so, letting yourself down is the last thing you'd want to do.

The palette of paints

I'd like to offer myself as an example;

After having to shed countless beliefs, and let go of countless ideals, I got tired of seeing myself as any one person. A good person, a bad person, a great daughter, a terrible student, as much as I wanted to I couldn't paint myself as any one of these people.

Black and white paints just wore out after a point, and I needed a fresh palette.

'Good' and 'Bad' are boxes that we outgrow as we grow into our complexities.

Rather than being a pointless shadow of who we wish we were, we could paint ourselves as abstract. We have enough and more shades to use, so why deny the fact that we are all in fact, a 'Mixed bag.'

So, in conclusion,

By embracing all the versions of ourselves, and by changing our beliefs about ourselves as we get older, we can form new core beliefs that are a better fit for the person we are. Rather than fostering the beliefs that are attached to who you were, you can create new ones that are in pursuit of who you are becoming.

We often hold ourselves back from being out of the box, and the moment we accept that we aren't just one thing, it all just falls into place.